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In my real life, I have a lot of friends who just don’t “get” Twitter. They say they don’t have time for it  (WHAT? Do they think I do?) And they always ask, “WHY would I want to know what [...]

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Lately it seems like my neck has a crick in it all the time. Not one of those “I can’t move my head and therefore have an excuse for not doing laundry or dusting” cricks. (I WISH.) More of a “This is annoying and every time I turn my head I sound like a bowl of Rice [...]

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Illness update:
Hannah…
…does NOT have pinkeye. WOOOOOO! She has a scratch that’s healing on the surface of her eye (thankfully, NOT the cornea).
(No pinkeye means I get to send her to school today! After two days at home! And right before a 5-day weekend with all of the kids here! All day! Every day!)
I…
…am STILL getting [...]

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I’m in a giving mood today, so I thought I’d share some linky goodness:
First, a Public Service Announcement.
“Hey Baby, take off your bra. I just heard about an approaching chemical warfare attack” is NOT a good pickup line.
Unless the woman is wearing this:
Yes, this is a real invention. It was awarded the IgNobel Prize in [...]

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Wowwwwwwwwwwwww…
How exactly does a blogger post the same video twice — in a row — and not realize it for DAYS?
I don’t know the answer to that question. But clearly, I was overdue for a BREAK.
The first two days of school went well for the kids. But enough about them…
They were GREAT for me. I [...]

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Every once in awhile, in an attempt to be “hip” and “cool,” I change the channel from “Classic Rock” to a Top 40 music station. It is educational, let me tell you. To illustrate, this line from a popular song:
“Shh, Girl! Shut your lips! Do the ‘Helen Keller’ and talk with your hips!”
Does anyone [...]

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So I have not felt like being funny at all the last couple days. Something to do with a tummy ache and fatigue and general malaise.
(Isn’t that a cool word? Malaise. So very FRENNNNNNCH. Malaise. Malaise. Malaise. I feel like Fancy Nancy.)
Without any funny of my own, I’ve been having staring contests with the Dell [...]

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Well, it’s April Fool’s Day. So I’m supposed to recode the blog to be sideways or now under the control of Reba McIntire or somebody.
But I can’t code.
Or I could post something completely made-up. But contrary to popular belief, I’m really not a very good liar.
(Shut UP. Everything on this blog IS true. I dare [...]

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