Patience is both very difficult AND very easy for me.

What do I mean? Well, I find BEING patient as much of a struggle as anyone else would, I guess. But ACTING patient? Piece of cake.

(And just to be clear: I’m NOT bragging.)

The skills learned in childhood are often used well into adulthood. And one thing I got really good at as a kid was ACTING patient.

A lot of circumstances could get credit for developing my expertise:

Some early abuse, family breakup, unreliable alcoholic bio dad, a period of serious financial struggle, a lot of time spent alone, etc.

The bottom line is that I didn’t always get what I wanted when I wanted it. My solution? Just stop wanting it.

Another way to say it: Some people focus on CHANGING the circumstances that they don’t like. For whatever reason, I just focused on FORGETTING them.

Because of my expertise in this area, from the outside I can look INCREDIBLY patient and calm. In fact, I’m often asked, “How can you be so peaceful while waiting for  fill in the blank?”

I’m never sure how to tell people that the answer is,

“Well, I’m ‘at peace’ because up until this moment I had totally forgotten all about what I was waiting for.”

Smooth, huh? Just call me Role Model.

This one-two punch of denial and distraction is demonstrated by many other wise people: drug addicts, alcoholics, Internet addicts …

Pretty much ANY addicts.

People with ADD seem to have an edge on developing it.

And depression has its roots DEEP in denial.

For a long time I thought my ability to distract myself away from impatience showed that I was practicing that virtue.

But now I know that “not worrying” isn’t the best strategy for me. Because I interpret “do not worry” as “do everything you can to not think about it.”

To practice patience, I have to “not run.” I have to actually FORCE myself to think about and feel the disappointment. Usually, by writing about it. Often here on this blog. After that, when I give it to God, I can actually sense the peace that indicates that I really GAVE IT TO GOD.

Because you can’t hand over a burden unless you admit that you’re carrying it.

How do you handle situations that require patience?

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I still … can’t remember … what I’m looking for… is originally posted at: The Red Clay Diaries - Rambling down the dirt road of life Copyright 2007-2011. Use only with permission. Follow me on Twitter. I'm redclaydiaries