Original post: December 11, 2008

1. This is my 99th post.
2. Since it’s the tradition, I might as well jot down 100 things that you might not know about me.
3. Or technically 99 things.
4. Because I’m rebellious like that.
5. Best. Product. Name. Ever:  The Samsung RANT — a cell phone. Cuz I know that’s what I spend most of my cell phone minutes doing.
6. The commercial that makes me laugh EVERY time I see it:  This One. I can’t help myself. And of course my favorite part is Chris Kattan’s appearance at the dry cleaner’s.
7. I wish someone would invent something to replace hangers. Wherever I go – closet, laundry room, back seat of my car – they lie in wait, prepared to leap off the rod and attack me without warning. Their hostility frightens me.
8. I lived in San Diego, California, for ten years.
9. Four of those years, in college, were spent overlooking the ocean.
10. I took it for granted, and now I miss it.
11. Just out of college, I lived on the edge of the gay neighborhood in the city.
12. I felt very safe walking around there.
13. It looks really cold in Chicago for tonight’s football game.
14. I’m glad I don’t live in Chicago.
15. When Charlie’s company planned their relocation from San Diego, they considered Chicago before choosing Atlanta.
16. I think I owe Charlie’s boss a kiss on the MOUTH.
17. I’m reconsidering the kissing-the-boss thing. Charlie, I didn’t mean it.
18. But he at least the boss deserves a hug. And maybe a card.
19. I got a passport when I was 19.
20. I’m the only one in my family of origin who has one.
21. My children got theirs at ages 3, 6, and 8.
22. I earned a bachelor’s degree in Spanish in college.
23. To this day, I’m still not clear on why.
24. I don’t get a lot of opportunities to speak it anymore.
25. I figure it made me culturally literate.
26. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.
27. My top spiritual gifts are encouragement and faith.
28. I grew up depressed and pessimistic.
29. Clearly I’m a much different person than I was at 20.
30. Or 30, for that matter.
31. But I’m proof that depressed people can be funny.
32. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.
33. I’m an animal lover.
34. I was obsessed with horses almost from birth.
35. I used to “ride” my eight-inch-tall plastic Breyer horses.
36. I broke a lot of plastic legs.
37. My mom started me in riding lessons when I was nine.
38. I almost became a rodeo trick rider.
39. But I kept falling off.
40. For some reason this disqualified me.
41. I got my own pony at age 12.
42. I was about 18 inches too tall for a pony.
43. But I soon replaced her with a horse.
44. I used to feed him every morning in pajamas.
45. No, silly. The pajamas were on me.
46. The horse preferred to sleep au naturel.
47. I grew up with dogs.
48. Plural.
49. The most we had at one time was five.
50. The better to terrorize the chickens.
51. Charlie’s family never had more than one dog at a time.
52. He never wanted for us to have more than one dog.
53. I found this out when I asked to get a second dog.
54. After we’d been married seven years.
55. Good thing one of us was honest premarriage.
56. We got the second dog.
57. Because I’ve got my husband whipped.
58. Just kidding.
59. Our second dog had been dumped, and he adopted us.
60. I named him Bob, after the Bill Murray character in What About Bob?
61. When we got Bob, he was totally infested with fleas.
62. Gives a whole new meaning to “seven year itch.”
63. I crack myself up.
64. Charlie considers Bob MY dog.
65. But he taught him to sing.
66. I love to read.
67. I’ll read anything.
68. I used to read cereal boxes at breakfast.
69. I read the horseracing pages at my grandparents’ house.
70. I learned a lot about odds and something called trifectas.
71. Not really. Math is not my friend. I remember nothing from those pages except the unusual horse names.
72. When my mom would have me sort used books at our junk secondhand store, I’d start reading and forget what I was doing.
73. Mom didn’t like that.
74. She got mad at me, then I talked back to her.
75. I spent a lot of my teen years grounded.
76. I thought my mom was the Meanest Mom in the World.
77. I was wrong. Apparently that’s my title.
78. Every day I deal with our preteens, I gain a new appreciation for my mom and dad.
79. I now know: Parents aren’t trying to ruin their kids’ lives.
80. Mom, I’d like to take this opportunity to thank you.
81. And apologize.
82. I’ve spent a little time in hospitals, but I’ve never broken a bone.
83. But I sprained my ankle really bad in 2006.
84. I had a cankle when cankles weren’t cool.
85. I delivered all three of my kids via c-section. After 36, 18 and 0 (scheduled surgery) hours of labor, respectively.
86. I still blame my lack of stomach muscle tone on that. Six years after the last one was born.
87. I had a severe needle phobia until age 29.
88. Then I had my first pregnancy and got blood drawn, like, 467 times.
89. I still hated needles.
90. During my later pregnancies, my older kids were present when I had blood drawn.
91. Being brave for your kids’ sake sucks.
92. Doing lots of things for your kids’ sake sucks.
93. Parenting showed me just how selfish I really was.
94. Am.
95. I became a Christian at age five.
96. I got to lead each of my kids to Christ when they were five.
97. Every year I get a better understanding of how much my life is a journey.
98. My blog’s tagline refers in part to that journey.
99. I wonder where God will take me next.