Self-control, self-control…
How in the world will I write about self-control for today’s One Word Blog Carnival?
It’s not like I’m a shining example of self-control or its cousin self-discipline.
Listen. Last night, I couldn’t even control myself with my middle child. I couldn’t keep myself from MAKING HER LIFE MISERABLE.
It all started when I wouldn’t let Hannah make herself the smoothie that I’d PROMISED she could make. Okay, I LET her, but I didn’t REMIND her. NO, I didn’t. I was LYING. Okay, I maybe I DID remind her, but I didn’t make sure she heard me. Clearly proving that I DON’T LOVE HER.
And I let ABBY go first with the blender even though I’d PROMISED that Hannah could go first. NO, I didn’t TELL her I was letting Abby go first. I was LYING. Okay, maybe I DID tell her to go first, but she TOLD me to wait. And I didn’t WAIT. For 45 minutes until she remembered again. Instead, I LET ABBY GO FIRST. Clearly proving that I love Abby MORE.
And then I fed Hannah dinner without REMINDING her about her smoothie. And I let her play a computer game without REMINDING her. And I let her go outside to shoot baskets without REMINDING HER.
Then I told her it was time to leave for gymnastics right when she was having fun shooting baskets. I SHOULD have TOLD her it was almost time to go BEFORE she went outside. I did NOT tell her. I LIED. Okay, maybe we DO always go to gymnastics on Mondays. I SHOULD have told her. Okay, I should have TOLD her more than the three times that I did tell her.
Then I let Abby bug her by TALKING to her. Then I YELLED at Hannah when she kindly and gently asked Abby to SHUT UP AND LEAVE HER ALONE. THREE TIMES.
THEN I SUDDENLY told her FOR NO REASON that none of us were going to gymnastics EVEN THOUGH SHE’D BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO GYMNASTICS SINCE LAST WEEK. Which RUINED her evening (and Abby’s) because clearly I LOVE Abby MORE. And then I MADE her go to her room to “calm down” when clearly she WAS CALM and it was ME being MEAN and JERKY.
Then when she came out to tell me more about how UNFAIR I was, I BANISHED her to her room AGAIN until she was ready to APOLOGIZE. Clearly I was a JERK.
See? I don’t know anything about self-control. I never practice it. That’s what Hannah told me this morning. After I let her live through the night.
Sorry. I got nothin.
But you should visit the Blog Carnival over at Bridget’s place anyway.
PS Is this irony? Ever since Alanis Morrisette’s “Isn’t It Ironic” song, I’ve been confused about that…
19 responses so far ↓
1 Kathleen // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:08 am
[coughing uncontrollably] [wiping eyes]
I see the bruises on the page. Black and blue mothering it’s called. Hang on for dear life.
wow, the battle scars are still pink here.
2 Robin Arnold // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:24 am
Gee, it’s a little early for her to be in the “Anne of Green Gables” dramatic/romantic/dramatic stage. My sympathies. She won’t go to Oz and get a brain until around 17 and she won’t think you have one until around 23.
Been there, done that.
3 Sarah Salter // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:28 am
Wow. And she’s not even a teenager yet… Wait ’til the hormones kick in!
Did I mention that I’m praying for you? Fervently.
4 BunBun // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:37 am
Oh why can’t they be like we were, perfect in every way, what’s the matter with kids today…
5 Melissa Brotherton // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:54 am
Laughing, worrying and praying all at the same time. I’m going through a small piece of this right now with my oldest and he’s only 5. It’s hard to have self control when you’re the mommy…especially a BAD mommy.
6 Erin // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:57 am
Oh good heavens. This is my life. Except with boys. But my life.
7 Wendy // Apr 20, 2010 at 12:08 pm
It’s too bad you can’t sell your kids to science like they did in the olden days, huh?
8 Marni // Apr 20, 2010 at 12:21 pm
You ARE a terrible mother. I had my suspicions, but now they’re confirmed. At least you can join my club of terrible mothers because I am one too.
I made youngest clean up her room before she went out to draw with sidewalk chalk and to ride her scooter. Also, I wouldn’t let her have eggrolls as an after school snack because they have 800mg of sodium and she has high blood pressure. Oh, and I was tired last night, so I made her go to bed 30 mins early so I could too. I let her play her DS in her bed and not have to put it up until her usual bedtime, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a Class A Jerk.
And Sarah is right. Wait until the hormones really kick in. I still have a counselor on retainer for when Peyton turns 12
9 Duane Scott // Apr 20, 2010 at 12:23 pm
SNort at Wendy. That was great.
Sounds like the battles that go around our house. Hey, at least you were honest!
10 joyce // Apr 20, 2010 at 12:25 pm
Some days are for sure more challenging than others. For that matter, some children are for sure more challenging than others.
They do come around but you’ve got a few years…hang in there.
11 katdish // Apr 20, 2010 at 2:05 pm
For shame! I feel your pain. My 8 year old was just complaining how unfair it is that her friends have phones that take pictures and SHE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A PHONE!!!
E-Gad! What a horrible mother I am!
12 jasonS // Apr 20, 2010 at 2:05 pm
Oh the drama. I’m planning on keeping my baby girl at her current age (6). I don’t need this kind of hassle…
13 Glynn // Apr 20, 2010 at 3:03 pm
Oh, boy, what we learn from kids, those little mirrors of ourselves. Good post, Stephanie.
14 Sandra Heska King // Apr 20, 2010 at 7:29 pm
Oh, the memories. This reminds me of my son telling us it was our fault he fell down stairs. “YOU bought this house. YOU put these socks on me. YOU called me downstairs. It’s YOUR fault.” He was 4.
15 Kathy // Apr 20, 2010 at 8:26 pm
It only gets worse. IF you live through it, she’ll love you and think you’re cool.
16 Louise // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:18 pm
Ok. So you are a perfectly perfect mother in all your human imperfection.
the good thing is, and I promise this, they do grow up and become these absolutely amazing, incredible awesome young women.
there is always hope!
You made me laugh and smile and remember those times.
My eldest once screamed at me, I dont’ love you anymore.
And I replied calmly, That’s ok honey. I don’t love you any less.
and then… within the quarter hour, I was screaming at her too!
17 Deb // Apr 20, 2010 at 11:33 pm
Not sure if I should laugh or cry…. but you might find comfort from something I read recently…
All children eventually leave home.
18 You bad lady!! | The Red Clay Diaries // Apr 21, 2010 at 1:07 am
[...] RSS ← NO, I do NOT have any self-control. [...]
19 Bridget Chumbley // Apr 21, 2010 at 3:19 pm
hahahaha
This could be a typical night in our home as well. It’s too bad you didn’t have anything to write for the carnival. Now go back to eating bonbons and putting your feet up…
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