Dear Dieree,
Todayy I came THIS close to catching prey.
Ruhmember how I used too git tertles evree day? Ah, thowse were the dayz… Crunchee on the outside and chewee inside. Mmmm, tertles.
Yeah, yer right. Tertles wuz badd for my teeeth. Annd Mom sed thay made my brethh smell like fish. Shee even sed eeting tertles made ME smell like fish.
Wutevver. It wuz still reeely fun licking the bowl… I mean shell … wen I finishd.
Enyway, todayy wen a big bird got hurt and lannded in the yard and I chaysed it, Dad yelld at mee. He tole me NO and so I got scayred.
Then Scruf got out and chaysed it tooo. He sed he wanted it to be his prizner, wutevver that is.
(The bird was BIG, so I wuz kinda hoping it wood EAT Scruf.)
Dad yelld more and I got more scayred. And the bird couldnt fly at awl. Finelly Scruf chaysed it into the garazge and it hided under Dad’s truck. Dad mayde us doggs go in the howse after that.
He sed the bird was a vulcher. Momm called sumbudee to come get it, then she sneaked out to tayke pikchers of the bird.
Deer Dieree, you wood not BAHLEEV how lowd Mom wuz out there. She sed it wuz becaz she trippd on kid toyz. Awl I knoh is that she did a tarribl job stawking and scared the vulcher right out of the garazge annd down the hill.
Sense the vulcher’s gone, Mom sez I ken go outside later. I wonder wut eating a vulcher will make me smell like.
Stay toond, Dieree. I heer they taste like chickin.
Mmm, chickin.
8 responses so far ↓
1 Sharkbait // Mar 8, 2010 at 2:58 am
And what is wrong with smelling like fish?
Hmm?
2 katdish // Mar 8, 2010 at 8:05 am
Oh, Bob! How I’ve missed your guest posts. And since your mom won’t give me a first run, would you consider writing one for me sometime?
3 Robin Arnold // Mar 8, 2010 at 8:10 am
I’ve said it before Bob, you need your own doggie blog. You have things to say.
4 Helen // Mar 8, 2010 at 8:34 am
I have missed you on the twitter. Why don’t you tweet anymore, big guy?
5 Marni // Mar 8, 2010 at 9:26 am
Bob, you would love my boy Howard. He likes to eat weird stuff too. I saw your tweet. I told you maybe mom could get you a Dentabone or something. They help with Howard’s roadkill breath.
Also? DO NOT eat the vulture. We hit one with our Jeep one time (they aren’t bright, as you found out). It smelled like dead squirrel, skunk and armadillo barfed on our car. It was a bad, bad day Bob.
6 Kathy // Mar 8, 2010 at 9:26 am
awww don’t eat the turtle! lol I have a 21 year old turtle that I would cry over if he got eaten! This was too cute
7 Wendy // Mar 8, 2010 at 10:57 am
Bob, you should really consider doing some squirrel hunting. And make sure to bring some back for your mommy master. She loves squirrels.
8 Stonefox // Mar 9, 2010 at 1:29 am
At least he’s not wearing the chicken, right?
Want to hear about your Israel trip- too cool!
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