Hey. I’m sick. Which seems to happen to me at this time every year. So a post from last fall seems especially timely.
Originally posted October 2008:
I purchased an instrument of torture yesterday. No, I haven’t gotten into some sort of kinky hobby. If only.
No, I bought this item because a lot of people-most of them in the blogosphere-recommended it. They said it was very effective at dealing with a head cold. And I must tell you, if you want to get rid of a sinus headache, it does the trick.
If by “get rid of” you mean “replace with something WAY worse.”
Like beating oneself about the head and shoulders with a pillowcase. Filled with doorknobs.
What is this instrument of torture of which I speak?
This bad boy.
If waterboarding is anything like the NeilMed Sinus Rinse, then I think I would vote with some politicians to classify it as torture. This “Original and Patented” Sinus RinseTM Kit is used to “irrigate” the sinuses. All you gotta do is fill it with a warm saline solution and SQUIRT it into one nostril so that it surges UP into your HEAD and OUT your other nostril. Easy peasy, right?
Um. No.
In the past 36 hours, I have filled my sinus cavities to overflowing with warm salt water three (3) separate times. I feel like I’ve spent a week at the pool, jumping off the high dive without holding my nose.
And when I say my sinuses were overflowing, I mean it. For each session I had to squirt one cup of water up my nose. Yes. You read that right.
ONE CUP.
As in: EIGHT OUNCES
Sorry about the shouting. But it is Not Natural to intentionally shove eight ounces of anything into your nose.
(That reminds me: I need to tell you about my sister Suzy and the piñata paper sometime.)
Anyway. Since I did this innocuously-named “nasal irrigation” twice yesterday and once today, that means that I have caused TWENTY-FOUR ounces of water to traverse my nasal passages. On PURPOSE.
I feel like a funnel. Or maybe a sieve.
Into which someone has aimed a firehose.
I can testify from personal experience that all that water manages to squirt out of orifices that you didn’t even know were connected.
All I can say is, this had better work. Or next you’ll find me in the doorknob department of Home Depot.
2009 PS After using the sinus rinse a year ago and NOT getting an infection for the first time in years, I’m now a sinus rinse evangelist. So far this weekend I’ve “irrigated” twice.
Try it. Breathing: It’s worth a little drowning.
18 responses so far ↓
1 Wendy // Sep 27, 2009 at 11:24 pm
Wow, you just make it sound so tempting…
2 Helen // Sep 27, 2009 at 11:29 pm
I hope I get to just take your word for it this year…
3 Billy Coffey // Sep 28, 2009 at 11:27 am
Never. In. A. Million. Years.
4 katdish // Sep 28, 2009 at 7:42 pm
You people don’t know whatcher missing. Am I right, Steph!
5 Candy // Sep 28, 2009 at 8:58 pm
We’re hog-tying Billy and hosing his nose. Just sayin’.
Folks, this is snot heaven. Really.
6 Heather of the EO // Sep 28, 2009 at 9:11 pm
I’m a newbie to this. Only tried it once. Now I’m inspired to flush my nose at least twice a day.
7 Annie K // Sep 29, 2009 at 7:10 am
Hey Steph – Happy Birthday!!! Hope you’re feeling better friend!
8 Mom // Sep 29, 2009 at 7:18 am
Happy Birthday to my lovely daughter.
What a day to be sick. I hope you’re feeling
better soon. I love you, Mom
9 Helen // Sep 29, 2009 at 7:46 am
Happy Birthday.
10 Jeanne Damoff // Sep 29, 2009 at 8:56 am
Happy Birthday! Hope it’s a super fun, snot free day!
11 Marni // Sep 29, 2009 at 9:44 am
Happy Birthday!! Here’s a little rhyme for you (No, I didn’t write it. I jacked it from Hallmark)
Don’t kiss your hunny…
When your nose is runny…
You make think it’s funny…
But it’s snot!
Ba da dum bump!!!!
Hope it’s a great one
12 Wendy // Sep 29, 2009 at 10:00 am
Happy Birthday! You may want to rethink the whole blowing out the candles thing though. Does everyone need your germs?
13 Evenshine // Sep 29, 2009 at 10:25 am
Is this akin to the instrument of torture known as the neti pot?
Sorry, I’m with Billy. NOT IF YOU PAID ME.
As a child I had allergies and had to spray nasal allergy medicine up my nose. It took an average of 45 minutes for each nostril.
Glad you found something that works. I think I’d rather…well, anything.
14 Bridget // Sep 29, 2009 at 11:23 am
Happy Birthday! I hope you are feeling better and the rest of the fam too! Enjoy…
15 Beth // Sep 29, 2009 at 3:47 pm
There once was a blogger named Beth
Who met a great blogger named Steph
Whose mucus did pour
On the day she was born
To prevent her from snotting to death
Happy birthday! Hope you’re feeling better! I myself have been battling the sinuses today…and I think I’m going to start a research project involving communicable diseases and the Twitter…
16 Sarah Salter // Sep 29, 2009 at 4:58 pm
I was going to come say something really inspirational for your birthday, but I really can’t compete with Beth. That’s hysterical! So, I’ll just say Happy Birthday and leave it at that.
Happy Birthday!!
17 janet oberholtzer // Sep 29, 2009 at 5:23 pm
I’ve been enjoying your world via your blog/twitter recently. Sorry you are sick on your birthday – hope it’s good anyhow.
Happy Birthday!
18 DesignHER Momma // Sep 30, 2009 at 7:39 am
I am so thinking of you today. Colds are the WORST. Feel better fast, and rest as much as possible!
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