UPDATED 7:00 pm EDT: Okay, the husband has pointed out a minor problem with my measurement of volume in the post below. I have further proven that I am neither a mathematician nor a cook. No, I did NOT know how many ounces are in a cup. [see below] This is why you don’t want me making you a meatloaf.
I purchased an instrument of torture yesterday. No, I haven’t gotten into some sort of kinky hobby. If only.
No, I bought this item because a lot of people-most of them in the blogosphere-recommended it. They said it was very effective at dealing with a head cold. And I must tell you, if you want to get rid of a sinus headache, it does the trick.
If by “get rid of” you mean “replace with something WAY worse.”
Like beating oneself about the head and shoulders with a pillowcase. Filled with doorknobs.
What is this instrument of torture of which I speak?
This bad boy.
If waterboarding is anything like the NeilMed Sinus Rinse, then I think I would vote with some politicians to classify it as torture. This “Original and Patented” Sinus RinseTM Kit is used to “irrigate” the sinuses. All you gotta do is fill it with a warm saline solution and SQUIRT it into one nostril. Easy peasy, right?
Um. No.
In the past 36 hours, I have filled my sinus cavities to overflowing with warm salt water three (3) separate times. I feel like I’ve spent a week at the pool, jumping off the high dive without holding my nose.
And when I say my sinuses were overflowing, I mean it. For each session I had to squirt two cups [OOPS. I MEAN ONE CUP] of water up my nose. Yes. You read that right.
TWO CUPS [ONE CUP]
As in: EIGHT OUNCES [I GOT THIS PART RIGHT]
Sorry about the shouting. But it is Not Natural to intentionally shove eight ounces of anything into your nose.
(That reminds me: I need to tell you about my sister Suzy and the piñata paper sometime.)
Anyway. Since I did this innocuously-named “nasal irrigation” twice yesterday and once today, that means that I have caused TWENTY-FOUR ounces of water to traverse my nasal passages. On PURPOSE.
I feel like a funnel. Or maybe a sieve.
Into which someone has aimed a firehose.
I can testify from personal experience that all that water manages to squirt out of orifices that you didn’t even know were connected.
All I can say is, this had better work. Or next you’ll find me in the doorknob department of Home Depot.
9 responses so far ↓
1 amy // Oct 9, 2008 at 2:13 pm
I understand this necessary form of torture. I use a “netty pot”… it looks like a small genie pot that you fill with water, tilt your head, pour into one nostril, let the water pressure flush out your sinuses and it drains out the other nostril. Not fun… but it works. Hope you feel better soon!
2 Kristen // Oct 9, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Someone just recommended a netipot to me. And I’m so sick and out of it sticking a tea pot up my nose sounds like a good idea. Of course, I’m now thinking twice after this post. lol. What to do…what to do…
In all sincerity, feel better soon. I know how you feel!!
3 Rachel K // Oct 9, 2008 at 5:45 pm
get well soon, and you’ve been tagged! Check out my blog for more info.
4 Lorie // Oct 10, 2008 at 9:03 am
Uhmmm…this sounded kind of painful. Poor you.
5 Stonefox // Oct 10, 2008 at 10:05 am
Steph, you’re killing me. I’ve got one of those things, but haven’t had the nerve to use it yet.
6 Steph // Oct 10, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Thanks for all the comments and well-wishes. I’m still sick, but functioning.
You do have to be feeling pretty lousy to even consider flushing out your nose. But I THINK it’s working. Either that or the saline has leaked into my brain.
7 Leigh Anne // Oct 11, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Bless your heart. Ugh…
But are you feeling better by now?
8 Steph // Oct 11, 2008 at 8:51 pm
@Leigh Ann,
I’m feeling a bit better today. What a strange illness. Now my girls have it and they’re miserable. And I haven’t even tried to flood their sinuses with salt water.
9 Gloria // Oct 13, 2008 at 8:32 pm
I’m dying here. You manage to have me laughing outl oud and at the same time feel so bad for you
and now the girls.
Might I suggest the Vicks facial mister to get rid of stuffed sinuses. All it entails is about 10 minutes of nice warm steam entering your nostrils as it gently unplugs them. Just use as needed. Suzy
will testify to the effectiveness of this method that
she called torture as a child.
Nice open sinus cavities ends my sinus headaches
quickly.
Love you, Mom
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