That’s what my 10yo son Little Charlie (aka LC) shouted as he stomped up the basement stairs into the house on Saturday afternoon.

Ooookay. What do you mean?

“I’m free! I don’t have to mow today; Dad says I can wait till Monday!” And he ran off to watch Pokemon.

Little Charlie’s dad followed him upstairs and told me that they’d made a deal:

• LC could either mow that very hot afternoon while his dad did other yardwork alongside him;
• OR he could get himself up early on Monday (Labor Day holiday) and get the mowing done by himself before 10am. If he did it, he’d get his full mowing salary. If he missed the deadline, he’d still have to finish, but he’d only get paid half.

I wasn’t really surprised that LC chose to postpone the job. He’s a smart, capable, talented, creative kid. but one thing he is NOT is a workaholic. Given the choice to “pay now and play later,” or “play now and pay later,” LC will ALWAYS choose the latter. He is definitely my son.

Now I’ve learned about myself as a parent that I can’t always trust my instincts. On Saturday they were definitely off, because what I instinctively wanted to do “for” my son was:

1. force him to mow right then so he’d have to practice “pay now/play later.” OR
2. manipulate advise him so he’d decide to mow right then. OR
3. nag remind him every moment from then till Monday morning of what he’d agreed to and what would happen if he didn’t do it.

Fortunately, God gave me and Charlie the wisdom to pick #4: hold our tongues and let him live with his choice.

So many bad parenting choices come from good intentions.

Dr. Phil and others talk a lot about how kids’ brains aren’t developed enough to predict the outcome of their actions. And anyone who’s been a parent can testify to the truth of that.

But when we can predict a negative consequence that our kids can’t, the temptation is not only to point that out to the child, but to do everything we can to convince them to make a different choice.

Totally good idea when life is on the line (like when they want to ski off the roof). But I think we need to pick our battles if we’re ever going to teach our kids to predict outcomes.

At least that’s my theory. Of course, my experiments don’t always turn out well. I’ve had to watch all three of my kids deal with the natural consequences of their decisions. But I think learning from little mistakes is actually helping them grow. I guess I won’t know for sure till they’re much older.

Meanwhile, here’s what happened on Monday morning. Little Charlie got up when his alarm rang, ate breakfast, and rode that mower all over our yard for two full hours. He finished the job at 9:55 a.m. The kid even had to do some minor repairs when the belt on the mower slipped. I can’t even describe how proud he was of himself. When his dad paid him, he beamed. Two days later, he’s still proud, and he loves that I’m writing this post all about him.

I’m proud of him too. We took a risk in letting him make his choice. And he got to enjoy the reward.